HW 25

to dinorah,

This was a really great short story. At first i didn't have a clue what was going on until the story progress and now i can't stop laughing. I really like how you emphasize the phrase "i should have said no," this made the story a lot more interesting as though something else could have happened if the main character was being himself rather than someone he is not. It also has a nice twisted ending that i thought the main character deserved.

to bao lin,

Your story portrays whats it like nowadays. As soon as something is cool, everyone wants to try it. This seems like a game of "follow the leader" and right there, Pahko lost his title when he himself decided to try something new and was beaten by a class clown, Eddie, who he thought was loser. This story shows that the "cool system" can change dramatically and anyone caught doing something stupid can change from being the best to being the worst.

to arden

I liked the beginning of your story very much. You seem to put every little detail in describing Dakota, not only what he is doing but his surroundings too which made him all the more stand out from everyone. I like how you made a background story of Dakota without telling such as, Sally giving him the pencil and looking around the class to see if anyone noticed. That right there you can interpret without telling that she wants to feel "cool" and thought by interacting with him, it would make her more noticeable. In the end, you yourself seem to think that assholes are cooler than a guy whose friendly to everyone.

to devin

Wait a minute...isn't this the story the class read when we were in the cemetery? If not then i like how, without really asking, portray the question "who is really the cool guy?" Because even though Harry sacrificed himself for this...jerk-off, only three people in the story knows about this. Everyone else will still think the main character is the cool guy while Harry is still hairy.

to esther

This was a rather different story then what i have read so far. Instead of taking place in a school, you took a different approach and made the setting their home. If you see this kids as cool, the none of the aspects of cool kids is that they have a little conflict with the mother. What i really found funny is that the only cool features seems to be that this kid surfs the web, is uncaring of this expensive luxury and that he has a schedule he seems to lack in following. Not only that but the kid seems to be in control of a vehicle even though he can't drive one, showing some form of dominance in his family.

Patterns:
These stories that i have read were rather interesting in their own ways. Patterns i noticed about he story is that it always starts out with the person (assuming that they are the cool one) who is cool. Never does it start with a nerd who turns cool, nor does it start with a person with nothing and becomes something. They always start either cool, or semi-cool as in they are somewhat noticed already. Another pattern in many of the stories is that they all have a sidekick. For Bao Lin's story the sidekick was Shawn. For Arden's story the sidekick was Sally. The most interesting sidekick was Devin's story where the sidekick was Harry, the unpopular kid. He was a sidekick not because he was really the only other character but because he acted like one in the end, sacrificing his dignity for the wicked.
Another pattern i noticed is maybe jealously? Not the main characters themselves, though maybe some of them, but in most of the stories the main character, cool and awesome personified, loses there status in the end by some random person that is never talked about. Why i think this is a form of jealously is because, this sort of reminds me of the seven deadly sins, one being envy. The reason why it is considered a deadly sin is because envy turns into hatred and jealously very quickly, because when you envy someone, you always think to yourself, "why can't that be me? why am i not burdened with his/her looks and mind?" And such thoughts like these we tend to picture the person, who we envy most, suffering. And that's how most of the peoples story end, in suffering. Another small thing i noticed is that every cool person is a guy.